A Matter Of The Heart: Calling All Christians

Recently, a blogger that I follow made national news when she posted a blog about her personal decision to no longer wear yoga pants. Although, the post went viral very quickly, she was clear that her intentions were to simply stop doing something that she felt convicted about. It was never to start a yoga pant/legging revolution. Obviously, this was a hot topic, especially among women my age. Actually, scratch that. It's a hot topic among women of every age, so naturally there was some controversy on the whole idea of leggings as pants.

I wasn't super interested in the topic until this morning. While scrolling through Facebook I came across MULTIPLE blog posts that were condemning Christians for taking the time to discuss this matter. At first, I agreed. They were calling for us, as Christians, to stop caring about trivial matters like pants and start caring about things that really matter, like hungry children, human trafficking, and missionaries who are putting their life on the line to grow the Kingdom. The second article was calling for us to be Champions of God's causes. No sooner than the time that it took for me to double click my home button and close Facebook, I was feeling convicted. I knew in my heart that somewhere between these two blogs, we had gone terribly wrong.

You see, the real problem has nothing to do with leggings causing men to lust after women's bodies or human trafficking. Both of those things are just symptoms of a bigger problem: a corrupted heart. Both writers, both blogs, are actually fighting the same battle. But neither of them was addressing the real thing that we need to fix.

At the end of my life, when I stand before the throne, I do not believe that Jesus will ask me whether or not I wore yoga pants. Nor will he ask me if I traveled to the other side of the world and fought for the rights of people in other countries. HOWEVER, I do believe that He WILL ask me if I knew Jesus Christ. He WILL ask me if I gave food to the hungry and my coat to those that were cold. He WILL ask me if I cared for the sick and needy the same way that I cared for my own needs. He WILL ask me if I showed the love of Christ every single day that I was on this earth.

Now, do not misunderstand me. If you were called to travel to the far side of the earth to share the great news of the gospel, that is an amazing thing. If you were convicted about wearing a certain article of clothing and choose to stop wearing said clothing to glorify your Father, that is also an amazing thing. But neither of those things will make you a 'good' Christian. Neither of those things will get you into Heaven. God has called us to love and live a life that glorifies Him. That can look like a million different things for a million different people. However, Christianity does not look like condemning another Christian for taking a stand for something they felt convicted about.

The two best Christians I know have never traveled outside of the state they were born in to go on a mission trip. Neither of them is an ordained minister. Neither of them holds an office. I am not sure that either one of them has ever even read the Bible cover to cover, but they love people more fiercely than I have ever seen. My mother loves every person that she sees. From old women to young babies, she has never met a stranger. Everyone is her best friend. My father wakes up at the crack of dawn to mow our widowed neighbor's yard and pasture. Then, he loads up his lawnmower and drives to his widowed mother-in-law's house to mow her yard, too. They invite everyone they know into their family, and they give everything they have to take care of the people they love. That, my friends, is love with its work boots on. That is Christianity. My parents put their heart into serving other people, and they do it to glorify God. Simple as that. That is what God cares about. Jesus Christ is concerned about where your heart is at, not where your mission trip took place.

If you want to change the world, if you want to do God's work, you do not have to stop wearing yoga pants. You do not have to travel to the far corners of the world to teach someone about Jesus. You can share Jesus Christ with every person you meet. You can plant the seeds in the person who sits next to you on the bus. You can plant the seeds with the cashier at the gas station. You can do it at work, at home, or at school. You can live a life that glorifies God in any place AND in any clothes.

Christianity is not judgement. It is not a set of rules. It is not becoming a champion for some cause and slapping Jesus's face and a Bible verse on it. It is loving real people. Every. Single. Day. In a very real way. It is about being a living testimony for the people that you come into contact with all the time. It is about being obedient to what God has called you to do. It is about repentance and trying to be a better person than the person you were yesterday. It is about recognizing that anything good in you or in this life comes straight from the Father God. The Bible says that any work done to Glorify God or grow the Kingdom of Heaven will be significant in the eyes of our Lord, so do not tell me that not fostering a child, not starting a campaign to end human trafficking, or not becoming a missionary makes me less of Christian.

Stay happy, my friends.

P.S. In order to be fair, I am including the links to the posts that inspired my blog post.

• http://jessicaguinn.theworldrace.org/?filename=america-i-love-you-but-i-dont-like-you
• http://veronicapartridge.com/why-i-chose-to-no-longer-wear-leggings/

What The World Needs Now

Every afternoon, five days a week, three hours a day, I get to play, teach, learn, and grow with a group of amazing fifth and sixth grade students. I consider myself very blessed. These students are in a premier public school. They have access to the best teachers, the best learning facilities, the best technology, and a wide array of extracurricular activities. They can join the orchestra or the art club. They can learn how to program computers, how to build a tent, and how to play the game of chess all within the four walls of their schoolhouse. These students literally have the world at their fingertips.

Despite all of that, I witnessed a terrible tragedy the other afternoon. While we were in the gym, I observed each group of students carefully. There were the future volleyball stars playing in the middle of the gym. There were the future basketball stars playing a game of knockout. Two young boys and two young girls were learning how to flirt at one end of the gym, and the little troublemaker boys were climbing on a pile of equipment at the other end. However, it was the little boy sitting alone at the end of the gym that really caught my eye and broke my heart.

I sat down beside him, and asked him what was wrong. He was slow to answer. Instead, we began talking about super heroes, his favorite being Guardians of the Galaxy. Slowly, he began to let me in. He told me the story of his friend calling him a terrible name. That friend and that little word had ruined his whole day. He was heartbroken. As I watched the other students and looked at my little friend next to me, I couldn't help but think that somewhere, somehow we have made a grave mistake.

Our students, our young people, our future have the capability to learn everything their minds can hold. Every year, we produce new books, new tests, and new material to teach them. All the time, we have a new study technique or a new teaching method to maximize performance. We drill science, math, and history into our students' minds, but somehow we've forgotten to teach them how to be kind. We've forgotten to teach them how to be human.

In this day and age, bullying is a hot topic. We want to stop all bullying everywhere. While I agree with the end goal, I disagree with the means. Stopping bullying is reactive. We are behind the curve. We must learn to teach our students to be kind, to love their fellow man. Not for the color of his skin, not for what he can do for you, love him simply for the reason that no person in this world should ever feel alone.

I have the chance to try and make that change every single day at work, but the change won't happen there. The change will happen with how you and I decide to treat people every single day. A child isn't born with hate in his heart. It is a learned habit from the people that he observes. Nelson Mandela once said, "People must learn to hate, and if they can learn to hate, they can be taught to love, for love comes more naturally to the human heart than its opposite." We live in a hateful society. Religious persecution happens everyday in every corner of the world. Racial discrimination still exists in every town in America, and domestic violence is present in epidemic proportions. If that is the legacy we are leaving for them to learn from, how can we expect them to behave any differently?

The type of change I am calling for will not happen easily. It will not happen by starting a campaign. It will not happen by electing new people to office, and it will not happen on prayer alone. We change this world with how we choose to  treat every single person that we come into contact with. A smile, a helping hand, an ear to listen, and a should to cry on- that is how we make the difference. How we treat the people that can do nothing for us. How we treat the people that have nothing to give. How we treat our parents, our friends, our coworkers, our teachers, our brothers and sisters. That is where the change lies. We must learn to show some compassion, some mercy, some forgiveness, and some kindness. Jackie DeShannon said it best when she said, "What the world needs now is love."

The choice is up to you- continue to hate or help the world learn to love.

Stay happy, my friends.

Who; Not What.

     "Hi, my name is Jackie."

     "Nice to meet you. What's your major?"

     "Animal Science."

     "Cool, what do you want to do with that?"

     "I have no idea...."

     [Insert looks of doubt and judgement here.]

I'm pretty sure that I have had that conversation about 1000 times in the last two years. You meet someone new, you are trying to get to know them, and the dreaded 'What do you want to do with your life' question will undoubtedly come up. From parents to professors and friends to colleagues, it seems to be the pressing question in everyone's mind.

Even though I'm fairly certain that we ask that question out of habit more than anything, I'm a little bit tired of hearing it. So, I wanted to clear some things up:
   
      1. I'm a millennial. Retirement is different for us. I have to pick a job that I am comfortable doing for the next sixty years, because, yes, I will probably be working until I'm 80.

     2. Just because I have not put a title on my goal, doesn't mean it doesn't exist. I may know exactly what type of work I want to do; I'm just not sure what companies are calling their 'genius inventor hero humanitarian' position these days.

     3. Not knowing what I want to do does not make me any less motivated or driven than the students who know exactly what they want to do.

    4. My deep-seated hatred of that question has less to do with the fact that I don't know what I want to do, and more to do with the fact that I think we're asking the wrong question.

Growing up, my parents never really cared about what we wanted to do specifically, so long as we wanted to do something. They cared more about the type of people that we would become instead of what job we would be doing when we got older. You see, the truth is doctors and lawyers are extremely important, but so are garbage men. CEO's are needed, but so are secretaries. It takes all kinds of kinds to make the world go 'round. At the end of the day, what really matters isn't what job we do, it's how we do it and what type of character we display. Jesus was a carpenter. Hitler was a politician. So maybe the question we should be asking isn't 'What are you going to do?' it's 'Who are you going to be?'

So, who are you going to be? For me personally, I have decided to be these four things.

     1. Christ-like: During Jesus's time on Earth, He was kind, but firm. He was bold, yet gentle. Most importantly, He was loving. He loved every single person He came into contact with. Whether they were a leper or a king, Jesus loved them fiercely. He also instructed us to love. It's important to note that Jesus did not say love them unless they were homosexual, pro-choice, or a different religion. He didn't say love them unless they drank on Friday night, made mistakes, or were different from you. He just said love them, and love them the best way you know how.

     2. Resilient: These days, everywhere you turn you can find a 'secret' to success. Everyone has a magic plan or a shortcut. So many people believe that they have figured out how to make you successful in whatever you want to do, whether it's career success, weight loss, or any other journey. This is the real secret: resiliency. No one in this life is free from heartache, grief, or failure. The difference in people that are successful and people who aren't is the ability to bounce back. The road does not lead to either success OR failure. The road to success is hindered by roadblocks called failure. Successful people recognize this. They take the time to grieve and heal. Then, they pick themselves up, dust themselves off, and get back at it. They settle for nothing less than what they desire, and nothing will stop them. Success is a process. It's a marathon, not a sprint.

     3. Graceful: I debated for awhile on what to call this trait. I considered elegant and humble, but finally graceful won. Graceful embodies both the characteristics of elegant and humble. To be graceful is to be modest. It is to be sure of oneself without ever needing to impose on anyone else's confidence. To be graceful, is to accept life as it comes. It is to be optimistic about the future and grateful for the past. It is to be natural and authentic. To be graceful is to be compassionate. It is to care for the world as much as you care for yourself. Graceful is beauty that cannot be defined.

     4. Passionate: I am not extraordinarily talented. I am not gifted or intelligent. I am simply passionate. Passion will push anyone to work the hardest, go the farthest, and learn the most. You don't have to be good; you just need to be passionate.

By no means am I belittling education or ambition. I will be the first one to encourage you to reach for more, and I will be the first one to push you to unlock your greatest potential. In addition, I am by no means saying that I have mastered these four things. I have simply decided that I would rather be known by these four characteristics than by any job title this world could ever give me. If you are like me and haven't figured out what you are supposed to do yet, do not to be discouraged. Spend time developing your talents and cultivating your character. Figure out what you are passionate about. Your purpose will lie where your talent and passion meet. You don't have to have a job title; jobs will change anyways. Just live your life and live it well. Do your best each day, and try to be better than you were the day before. If we spend a little more time trying to develop our character now, maybe we won't be impeaching presidents and suing doctors later. Stop focusing on the job. Focus on the person.

     Stay happy, my friends.

Learning to Laugh at My Mistakes

Do you ever have those days when you're just feeling 'blah'?

Like nothing is really wrong, you just don't feel like things are right? Sometimes I feel like I have those days all the time. I'm not really sad or upset; I just feel restless, like I need a change. Well this past Sunday happened to be one of those days. In all honesty, it was a great day; I just wasn't excited. In my misery, I decided to do something about it.  I made the horrible decision to... cut my own bangs. (Mistake #1)

It was the perfect change! It could change up my look just enough to give me a fresh outlook on my life, without being too dramatic. (For the boys reading this: Yes, changing our hair really can refresh the way we look at things.) I was so excited. Without hesitation I grabbed the craft scissors from the kitchen drawer (Mistake #2) and headed off to my bathroom. I grabbed a comb, the trashcan, and the scissors and began chopping away. I only cut a little at first; then I realized it wasn't even. So I cut a little more...and a little more...and a little more. (Mistakes #3, 4, &5). Before I knew it, I had bangs at three different levels, and they were doing anything but laying flat.

Cue panic. Call Mom.

I ran to the living room half laughing/ half trying not to cry. I was trying to convince myself it didn't look as bad as I thought it did and that my mom could fix it. When I turned the corner into the living room to show her, her mouth dropped open. Then, before I could say anything, she was doubled over in laughter. Not even giggling. I'm talking, arms around stomach, leaned over, gasping for air laughter. Between gasps for air, she tried to ask me what in the world had driven me to cut my bangs. At this point I realized, I had no real answer. Then I began to laugh, too.

For the next hour, Mom and I stood in my bathroom trying to salvage my new haircut. It took us so long, because we couldn't hold still for laughing. We never could get my bangs quite right, so we finally gave up and called the hairdresser.  It was silly and ridiculous and probably the most fun I had my whole weekend at home. My giant mistake turned into a memory that I will cherish forever.

Later that night, as we laid on the couch watching a movie, I realized that, even though that had NOT gone as planned, I felt happier than I had most of the weekend. I felt as happy as I should have been feeling all weekend. Then I realized that maybe life is a little bit like that too.

The older I get the more I realize that life has a funny way of never going the way we plan. Whether a relationship we thought we would be in forever ended, the person who was never supposed to let us down did, we didn't get the job that we always thought we would, or maybe we just got a really bad haircut - it is not the end of the world. Real life is messy and difficult and frustrating, but we have a choice to make. We can choose to panic, get mad, and give up, or we can laugh, get motivated, and give it another try. We can choose to laugh at our mistakes. We can choose to be thankful for the experience. We can choose to recognize that, even though life has a funny way of never going as planned, it also has a way of placing us exactly where we were meant to be all along.

Unfortunately, we'll probably still have days when we're just feeling 'blah', but that's okay. Those days make us aware of when we need to make a change in our lives. The good news is we don't have to be scared of the change. When we trust that our life has a plan, we know that no matter what happens, everything will be okay.

Trust that your life has a plan. Learn to laugh at your mistakes, and be grateful for the moment in time that you were blessed with. It may just turn out to be one that you'll value forever. Stay happy, my friends.

Accept The Apology You Never Got...And Give The One You Aren't Ready To

"Do unto others as you'd have them do to you."

When I was little, the lady that babysat me would drill this into the minds of all of the children she kept. Whenever we would steal a toy or refuse to play with someone, she would always make us sit down and repeat the 'Golden Rule.' The older we got the more we tended to roll our eyes when we were forced to say it, but that never stopped her. She was going to make sure that we knew it, and now, thanks to her, it is engraved in my mind. However, I will be the first to admit that I am quick to forget it in times of trouble. Us girls are known for our ability to turn the silliest tiff into a full blown war, and I seem to have an uncanny knack for returning fire. It's the surrendering that I have a problem with, and I have ruined my fair share of relationships because of it. I've learned quite a bit from those failures though. I'm not going to pretend that I have relationships figured out now; there's still a lot that I don't know...

 But here's what I do know: you will fight with someone. That person will hurt you, but you will also hurt them. Someone will disappoint you, but you will also disappoint them. There are two sides to every argument, and there is no such thing as a fair fight. You can't go through life avoiding these situations. (If you do, I advise you to grow a backbone.) However, you can control how you respond to them. Don't waste time. Go apologize to them. Do your best to make it right. Forgive them. And LET IT GO.

 Do not be concerned with whether or not they apologize. Do not be concerned with whether or not they acknowledge that they hurt you. Do not even be concerned with whether or not the relationship continues - just take care of your business. All too often we believe that the quickest way to make the world better is to 'teach someone a lesson.' In reality, the quickest way to make the world better is to let go. Stop hanging on to past hurts, stop hanging on to unforgiveness, and stop waiting on someone else to make the first move. The person that hurt you is not responsible for making you unhappy; you are responsible for still carrying around that baggage. 

Let go of heavy hurts. Forgive those that hurt you. Accept the apology you never got. If you do those three things, you are bound to find your happier days. Stay happy, my friends. 

Practically Perfect In Every Way

My sister is probably my favorite person in the whole world. Where I am to-do lists and structure, she is creativity and chaos. She is my best friend. This past weekend, I traveled the 80 miles to Houston to visit her. It never fails- any weekend we spend together is an adventure. This weekend was no exception. In a 24 hour window, we ate weird macaroni and cheese, spent hours searching for the perfect French Macaron, sang Christmas carols at the top of our lungs with the windows down in downtown Houston, ate a rueben sandwich as big as our heads, and painted pottery on a whim. (In case you can't tell by that list, we're most definitely foodies.) All of these things were on a list of firsts for both of us, especially the pottery painting. True to fashion, my sister painted a Mary Poppins themed plate, and I painted one with hearts over the only two places I've ever called home. 

Around her plate, she painted the phrase 'Practically Perfect in Every Way,' a phrase Mary Poppins coined herself. We didn't realize it at the time, but that phrase became the theme of the weekend. 

We finished off our weekend visiting a spot we hadn't been to since childhood, the Bush Intercontinental Airport Observation Lot. It's simply a parking lot located on Old Lee Road (appropriately named after our family) where families can go and watch the airplanes land. For the most part, it's a place to take young children, but my sister and I loved it. Sitting in that parking lot, I was five years old again, and I loved watching those giant birds come in. 

As great as this weekend was, it also raised two important questions: 

When was the last time you did something for the first time? When was the last time you really marveled at the world around you? 

It sounds cliche, right? Like all I'm saying is stop and smell the roses. It's a phrase we've all heard a thousand times, but do we actually ever listen to it? I can honestly say that it's rare for me to ever do anything outside of my comfort zone. I am all schedule and responsibilities, and, in my constant quest for success, I am never about slowing down to appreciate anything. But this weekend was different. 

As we watched those airplanes and drove through the skyscrapers of downtown, I couldn't help but think that those monuments were once just a figment of someone's imagination? At one point, it was simply a dream to even travel through the air, and now trans-atlantic flights happen daily. At one point, they were truly a monument of modernization; now, they're simply a convenience. With that kind of progress, it's easy to forget how special things like that are. 

After pondering those planes for a while, I realized I've been forgetting much more than that. There are so many beautiful things in our every day lives that are so easy to miss if you aren't paying attention: the smile of a new friend, the laugh of a child, or the feeling of sunshine on your face. If we don't slow down and really look around, if we don't take a chance and try something new once in a while, we are bound to miss more than we ever imagined. 

I'm not, by any means, saying that life will be perfect, because our weekend was anything but. You see, it turns out that the macaroni was terrible, the macarons were chewy, you get weird looks for singing Christmas carols in February, and we drug our arms through our paint more times than we cared to count. Life will be exactly the same way. Whether you're doing something for the first time or the fifteenth time, there's a chance you could screw it up. Things will get messy, but there is beauty in the mess. The imperfection is perfect. Because when we try something new or when we just slow down long enough to see the beauty that's already in our lives, we realize that Mary Poppins was right all along. Life is "practically perfect in every way."

Stay happy, my friends.

The Beginning

For months and months, I've been debating on starting a blog. On the one hand, it's an opportunity to write down all of my deepest thoughts and feelings. However, on the other hand, it's an opportunity to write down all of my deepest thoughts and feelings. (Yes, I count that as a pro and a con.) Potentially, I could provide a brand new perspective and inspire someone, or people could just find out how crazy I am. It's a lot to consider.

Recently, though, as more and more of my friends began participating in the '100 Happy Days' challenge, I realized that it was the perfect time. The challenge calls for its participants to seek out 100 different things that make them happy and post about one of them each day for the duration of the 100 days. I love it. I love the idea of seeking out something new each day that makes you happy. Maybe it's my inner hippie, but I believe that happiness is a way of travel, and there's no better way to find it than by seeking out the ordinary things that provide it.

In honor of that idea, I decided to begin the 'Happy Days' blog, a blog completely dedicated to finding happiness, fulfillment, and individuality (I'm original- I know) in a world with plenty of problems to get bogged down in. To kick off this search for 'Happy Days,' I have decided to provide a list of 15 things that make me happy.

1. Jesus
2. America 
3. Agriculture 
4. Mexican Food 
5. Horses 
6. Good music 
7. Black coffee 
8. Monograms 
9. Sweet Tea 
10. Long talks with good friends
11. Cupcakes 
12. Audrey Hepburn 
13. Pearls 
14. Aggie Football 
15. Sunrises (sunsets are too cliche) 

I know I said 15, but....

   16. Thunderstorms
   17. Farmer's Markets
   18. Fresh flowers
   19. My family
   20. Rivers
   21. Antique Stores

Yes, my list is all over the place, but those things really make me happy. And I believe finding happiness is really that simple. It's about seeking joy in the little things each day. It's about choosing to see the good in the situation, instead of the bad. It's about choosing to believe that there is still good in the world, and it's about choosing to accept that this is the life we've been given and it's ours to direct. Friends, when we do that, we are bound to find our happy days.